Momo's Last Days

September 1 through September 3, 2018

September 1, 2018

My aunt had called in the morning to tell me that something was wrong with the way Momo was breathing. His breaths were shallow and labored and he was not making his usual snoring noises. Auntie Jenn said he had not been eating much for the last week or so and that he may be dying.

When we got to the house I tried to feed Momo one of his favorite treats: Wellness Soft WellBites in the lamb and salmon flavor. I played “The Game” with him where I hide the treat in one of my hands and hold both fists out to him to see if he can select the correct hand that holds the treat for him to eat. He struggled to lift his paw up and place it on my hand to let me know where he thought the treat was. He ate the treat and this was also the last time he would ever eat something again. I cried because I knew this was the last time I could play that game with my dog and I knew that I would lose him soon.

September 2, 2018

Momo became weaker and weaker. He would struggle to hold his head up and kept moving his head from one side to the other on his bed to try and find a comfortable position. He would not eat and he was not strong enough to drink from his water bowl unassisted. At some point I had to cup the water in my hands and let it run down my fingertips so Momo could try to drink the water that fell back into the bowl. He was so thirsty. I held out my wet hands so he could try to lick the water on my fingers. He threw up water and bright yellow bile. As he slept I noticed mucus forming around his eyes and there was some coming out of his nose.

We were all so sad that Momo was hurting and he would not get well. But we also felt so lucky that all of this happened during Labor Day weekend when we could all be with him and be together and make sure that he was never alone.

I thought of how lonely Momo was without Granny since she had passed away. And I thought about Granny as I sat with Momo. I remembered surrounding Granny with my family in the hospital during her final hours. I thought of how painful and tormenting it feels to watch your loved one’s life slip away, and yet at the same time you don’t want to be anywhere else in the world because this is the absolute last chance you will have time with this loved one on earth.

I wanted to forever remember the sound of Momo breathing, the way that he smelled, the cowlick on top of his head, the way he rested his chin on my arm as I curled up beside him, his rainbow diaper suspenders, sitting on park benches in the sun with him, wiping his paws off and cleaning his folds after every walk outside, changing his diapers, picking up his poop off of my bed or the floor after he had an accident, holding him in the shower to wash him and then using a hair dryer to dry his fur, looking over my shoulder as I washed the dishes to see him watching me from the entrance to the kitchen, letting him lick the beaters after I mixed a batch of cookie dough, feeding him strawberries on picnics, baking a pumpkin so he could have fresh pumpkin puree to eat, finding pieces of his fur on everything, the warmth from his chin whenever he pressed it against my shin when he wanted a bit of what I was eating, washing him in the kitchen sink while my nephew helped, the little bump on his right foreleg, telling him about every little thing on my mind, and so much more!

I sat with Momo for hours. He would sometimes lift his head up to watch the kids as they played around him. But mostly he slept.

September 3, 2018

Momo passed away a little after midnight. My aunt didn’t tell me until very early in the morning though because she knew I would not be able to go back to sleep. She was right.

I went to Peet’s to get coffee for my uncles, brother, and myself. It would be a long day. I started sobbing as I climbed into my uncle’s truck when he picked me up from Peet’s.

The house was silent when we got there. Momo looked like he was sleeping, but as I pet his head I could feel how cold he was. My little Chublet was gone.

I prepared breakfast for us. As I was cooking I caught a glimpse of my Uncle Mike outside. He was digging Momo’s grave.

We wrapped placed some of our t-shirts over Momo’s body and he was bundled up in woven purple paisley silk. We lowered him into the ground with some photos of the family, one of his favorite toys, a couple toys from the children, and roses clipped from Granny’s rosebushes. He has a little garden now with hibiscus flowers and a tiny tulip magnolia tree.

Momo was a great dog and my best friend. He lived to be thirteen years old, and for twelve years he brought so much joy and love into my life. I miss him every day.